Everything is fine.

Had a small scare the other day- I found a lump. On Tuesday, I had an ultrasound and it turns out that it is nothing. I probably was feeling scar tissue or a weird fat deposit. Both the Radiologist and the technician could find nothing unusual so... Big sigh of relief.

Steve, my brother, is doing OK with his radiation and says that everything is uneventful on that front. Mum went to stay with him, since as he goes on with the treatment, he'll almost certainly get tired. You know how tired you feel when you have a sunburn? Well, that's what radiation does.

Getting a little bit done around the house. One box at a time.

Had a weird thing happen on Tuesday. I cam home after getting my hair cut and I couldn't get in the house. My key wouldn't work. I waited around for a while for Chris and then I went and got some nachos... His key wouldn't work either, so we had to get in through the back door. Looks like the lock just went bad. Chris changed it out.

Weekend update

So. Update.

Work still sucks as far as work/class load and I have not had the promised reduction. I also lost the student teacher I was supposed to have next semester because she dropped out of the program. I am proud of myself that I told my principal that I fully expect to be rated as "exceeds expectations" in my annual appraisal (coming up this week) because I am clearly exceeding expectations by teaching so many preps. His first response was surprise(I guess he didn't expect me to be so assertive) and his second: that I need to be careful about attendance. OK. BUT the main reason I have missed so much work (AND been docked for it) is that the ridiculous amount of stress is making me sick. I had used up all my sick and personal days for the school year by the end of October!!! Arrggh. Two weeks until Christmas holidays!! I can make it....
I am trying:
Not to stress...
To be more zen.
To let go.
To be OK with not doing my best ('cause there aren't enough hours in a day) and do "enough."
To remember that other things and people deserve my attention too. Chris needs to move up the priority list to the top! After all, he'll still be my husband (hopefully!) long after this school year is a fuzzy memory.

Steve is here visiting this weekend. He is all marked up so he can start his radiation this coming week. Turns out they just "sharpied" him. He didn't get the prison tats that I got! Oh well, each doctor has his/her own style. Don't get too excited about the tats - they are 3 dots that look like blueish freckles. I've got one under each arm and one in the center(ish) of my chest. Since the low cut neckline look is permanently out for me I don't think anyone but Chris will ever see it/them.

Healthwise: I have been fighting an upper respiratory infection since November 1st. I get better and then worse. Right now it is just a lovely phlegmy cough. Mum has had this for about 2 weeks longer. Chris still hasn't gotten it! Thank goodness. Breast Cancer-wise: My mastectomy side armpit muscles have been really tight and ouchy and my prosthetic has been slightly painful lately, but there is not much to do about that but to do my stretches. I know I have an appointment for my 3 month check coming up this month, but I don't know when. I MUST make a call today and find out

Steve

My brother, Steve, was just diagnosed with ductal carcinoma in situ! Yes. Breast Cancer. He is justifiably freaked. It sounds as though he is quite fortunate in that it has not spread beyond that site - thus the "in situ." He just had a biopsy that removed the cancer with clear margins, so now he has to find out where to go next. He has seen a Radiation Oncolologist and has asked me for copies of my genetic testing. Interestingly enough, the genetic testing indicated I was not positive for the supposed "breast cancer gene", so he won't be either.

School is still CRAZY and my schedule has not been reduced. I am becoming more "squeaky wheel" about it. We aren't even at Thanksgiving and I have used all my sick and personal days! I also have gained back all the weight I lost. Although I love my job and my students it is making me sick and I can't have that.

Excellent quote: “If a doctor, lawyer, or dentist had 40 people in his office at one time, all of whom had different needs, and some of whom didn't want to be there and were causing trouble, and the doctor, lawyer, or dentist, without assistance, had to treat them all with professional excellence for nine months, then he might have some conception of the classroom teacher's job.”
–Donald D. Quinn, teacher

Checking in

Busy. busy. This week marks the end of the 1st 9 weeks and all my students have projects due. Of course, I can't be like every other teacher and just assign one thing and make them do it. I have to give them multiple choices! So I'm teaching 4 different novels and have... so many balls in the air I don't know which way is up.

A friend of mine, Anthony Washington, just died. He had cancer and had gone through a lot before I joined him in the cancer fight. His cancer was all throughout his body and he dealt with a lot of the indignities of cancer with a smile. He TAUGHT while wearing a "chemo bag," endured multiple surgeries, and the loss of bowel control. He really helped me to stay positive. I haven't seen him in a while since I no longer teach at Central. I am beyond sad to hear that he is gone. I found out via e-mail today during class and had to leave my students with another teacher to try and get my act together. I guess I thought he was keeping it at bay. Somehow.

Sorry, I haven't forgotten you...

Busy. Very busy. My teaching assignment is VERY heavy right now and it doesn't allow me time to do everything -heck, not even MOST of it- I feel needs to be done. Things will get easier. I have been promised an "easing" in the next 3 weeks.

Busy tonight packing to go to Wichita for a big Horner wedding! I was raised with the Horner kids and they are family. OK. So we're not really related by blood, but we're as "family" as you can get without official adoption papers. It will be great to see the whole clan! Last time I was there it was the summer before my cancer diagnosis.

I promise more soon, including details of the Susan G. Komen walk - which I am still sore from?!

We're walking...

Chris and I will be walking in the Susan G. Koman walk on October 2nd. I will really have to work up to the stamina required, but I know I can do it! If you are able please contribute. I DO really wish that nobody had to go through what I did, or worse, die from breast cancer. I had the benefit of really good treatment and a support system -things that not everyone has. I can truly say the experience was not a good one. There is a link to my page above.

I am very grateful today for what I have. I am cancer free. I have a husband who is my best friend and whom I love. I have friends all over the world, who although I don't necessarily communicate with them regularly, still love me and I them. I have a job that I am passionate about and that allows me to make a difference in the world. I have a house with walls that go all the way to the floor! I have a bunny who is finally happy. My mother, who I am closer to than ever, now lives across the street! And... I have you!

One week down...

We made it through to Friday!!! I still do not have textbooks, but luckily have enough experience/chutzpah to be able to wing it. Today, after doing a bunch of sequencing exercises using a/the recipe, I made banana splits with the 5th graders. Messy. Fun. The 9th graders have begun annotatingTo Kill a Mockingbird and I've completed diagnostic tests on all the students from 5th up. I have earned the weekend.

Have been crashing hard at night. Last night after work we celebrated -yes, again- Mum's birthday at Tiki on Bolivar with steaks and margaritas. My friend Jessie and Mum and I had been trying to get together. Unfortunately, I got home and was able to putt around for only an hour before I went to bed... I guess I have to build up the stamina again. I am both physically and emotionally spent. I have a bunch of the afore mentioned diagnostic tests to grade and have made the decision that THEY WILL NOT GET DONE THIS WEEKEND!!! I will be busy decompressing.

Coinin got adopted! We are very happy. He and Haas had been trying to kill each other and we decided that Coinin would be the most likely to get adopted, due to his age. He was living with a foster family and up for adoption for over a year!! I can't tell you how it felt seeing him on the website month after month. Interestingly enough, although he was up for adoption with the Houston Bunny Buddies, he was adopted by a family in Galveston. As an aside, Haas has come into his own lately. He wanders around the kitchen, dining and living room and has even made his way into our bedroom! He will come running(hopping?) to get a snack or head rub. He is a happy guy.

School

Today was the first day of school and I'm already exhausted. My teaching assignment is REALLY heavy(and crazy): 5th grade English Language Arts, 6th grade English Language Arts, 7th grade English Language Arts, 8th grade English Language Arts, 9th grade Pre-Advanced Placement English I, 7th and 8th grade Theatre Arts. I have the 5th and 6th graders every day and everything else every other day. Arrgh. I only have one conference period each day. Hate to sound like a whiner, but I still don't have my textbooks for each level - the ones I'm supposed to use as the curriculum. Each level has their own textbook and I haven't read any of them let alone planned anything useful. I was expecting to teach 6-9, and already strategizing how I could handle it and then I got 5th!

I am trying to be zen and BREATHE.

It is August already?!

Today I was in yet another training for the upcoming school year. This is a 4 day thing and should be fairly interesting. It has to do with the new 9th grade Pre-Advanced Placement class I'll be teaching.

Hope you like the new layout. New name. Maybe I'll change the name monthly?

Just booked a ticket to go to El Paso on August 11 for a few days. A crown that I got the last time I saw Patrick, my brother-in-law the dentist, seems to be "faulty." I am heartened by the fact that I'll get to see family (Patrick and Lauren and clan) and friends, particularly Danny and Lisa. It is almost enough to make me look forward to the trip! I am so fortunate that Patrick will squeeze me in to his schedule. I also have a whole week without any trainings so I'm available to go.

Had an appointment with Dr. Silva, my surgeon, last week and she feels I'm doing well. I am on her schedule for December to check in again, but there are no new concerns. Interesting thing happened at that appointment: I was speaking with the Resident and he asked me all sorts of history questions. I had a hard time placing the events of my cancer treatment in order. I find it curious that, the human mind - at least mine- copes with stressful stuff like cancer by "forgetting." Then, he asked me to estimate, from before treatment to now, where I "was." He meant, am I now at 80%, whatever... I was feeling pretty good that day and said 85%. When I told Chris about the conversation later he estimated 50%! Perhaps he's right. MENTALLY I'm at 85+, but physically more like 50. Still get tired very quickly.

I tried to make an appointment with Vickie, the lymphedema therapist, and she has the temerity to be on vacation! Yes, more evidence that the world doesn't revolve around me. I suppose I'll connect with her later.

Our house is starting to come together. Chris has been doing a lot of work. Today, while I was at work, folks came and cleaned the ducts and put new grills (registers?) in the house. Chris has finished my bathroom - new shower curtain with a curved rod! We also picked up Haas yesterday. I missed him. We were worried he may have forgotten us (or maybe he was just pissed?) but he seems happy enough today.

Mum is steadily unpacking at her place. Oh! By the way, she celebrates her 70th birthday on the 15th! Donna and Michael(Chris' brother and his wife - they took care of Haas) are going to come down and we'll go out to eat. i've also invited my friend Jessie. Mum loves a good steak.

More soon. I mean it this time! I might even be able to update with my NEW iPhone!!!

I'm home AGAIN.

Was in Houston for 4 days doing a training and got home last night. Stayed in a hotel and had a good time, but was glad to come home. I don't intend to leave home again anytime soon. Goal is to get enough unpacked to be able to do all the "home functions." Cooking would be useful. I'd like to use my shower... I'd like to use my computer... Lots of cleaning and unpacking to do.

Oh, yeah. Chris and I got new phones! Same numbers, though.
More later.

I'm home!!!

Got home last night at about midnight. Chris wasn't expecting us until tomorrow and was surprised. We were driving (Mum and I) and it was 7:30 p.m. We saw a sign saying "Galveston 88 miles" and thought that it was silly to spend another night in a motel. Oh. You are asking yourself why did it take so long to go 88 miles? Well, we went down 87 to Sabine Pass, not realizing that the road no longer goes all the way through. They still haven't rebuilt it since Ike. So, we had to go back and retrace our steps. THEN we had to wait a good long while for the Ferry, since they only run one an hour so late in the evening and we had just missed one.

We are still waiting to hear word on where Mum's stuff is. The truck broke down somewhere and they missed the scheduled delivery date of Monday the 12th. Good thing we didn't rush.

The house looks beautiful. The mountains of boxes in the center of each room distract a bit, but we will get to them eventually. Anyway. Home safe and sound. I will write a bit about the journey later...

No name

No new name yet.

Packing is getting done. Carrie and Kimon (DeLa Garza), who may as well be cousins, since we were raised together, were here this past weekend. Carrie is the daughter of my Mum's BFF Sally and Kimon married into the family. Point is: They are family. Their son Karl is 14 and HUGE. A string bean, but very tall. I saw him last when he was a toddler! They helped by packing a lot of stuff. It was nice to see them. They moved here to Florida just as Chris and I were leaving in 2001. Mum and I plan on visiting at their place in Cleremont for a day or so on our way out of Florida. They are really great people and good company.

Today we went running about. Mum and I went to Chase Bank to deal with the condo. Mum has applied for a "deed in lieu." We await the answer. The lady there made it as pleasant as possible, and was very kind. Then we went and ate at an Amish restaurant-to celebrate our bravery and tenacity. Never had Amish food before and it was amazing. The coconut cream pie is(I say IS because the pieces are HUGE and I brought some home - still working on it) to die for. We also returned something to the bookstore and went to the library...

It has been raining every day in late afternoon and we haven't been to the pool. I wish we could make more use of it. Before we leave here we DO plan to get to the beach.

Health: my chest has been just a bit swollen and uncomfortable, and my knee has been letting me know it is still there. Otherwise I feel pretty good.

Mum has misplaced her keys and we are searching... Since this is a 3 bedroom condo and there is stuff in various states of packing EVERYWHERE, the search is frustrating. She has extra keys for everything except the mailbox, so we are just going to camp out and wait for the mailman to appear tomorrow. You know how this works: As soon as she "writes them off" and decides to stop looking, they'll turn up.

Hope everything is OK in Galveston. Hurricane Alex caused them to close the schools (summer programs) in anticipation. I think they may have some high water and winds, but our house should be fine. Chris tells me that they have stained the entire floor!!!

New Name?

My dear friend Joel suggested it might be time to re-name the blog. I suppose I should continue with writing here...

Anyhoo. I'm looking for suggestions. Please leave a comment with your ideas - the ones you are willing to share.

Brief update: Things are going well here in Bradenton. Mum is getting packed. I'm resting and reading. We have been to the pool a few times, after dark of course. I got a new swimsuit that accommodates the foob and doesn't look too weird. We had the inaugural swim last night and it did OK. There's a weird balloon thing that happens at the base of the straps though... Swimming has made me mindful of the knee and ankle issues and seems to exercise them in a way that they do not like- much. My sister, Becka, told me that her ankle was talking back to her after she spent time at the beach. The next day mine started making itself known. Coincidence?

Haven't had any arm/hand swelling. I had a little pain, but I iced it and that seems to have done it. I received my new CUSTOM sleeve in the mail and tried it on. Woo. It took both of us, Mum and I to get it on! I understand it will stretch a bit, and I'm glad I don't have to wear it all the time like some people do.

I was able to see my massage therapist from when I was here in Bradenton getting my chemo. Katrina really helped me through the rough stuff. Funny thing, I didn't recognize her. I guess I was really not too "present" during that time. She gave me an excellent massage and I hope to go back to her before we leave. Actually, I MUST. Turns out we got so involved talking and so forth that I left without leaving her a gratuity. I gotta go back and make it right.

Chris sent me pictures of our house which is finally getting painted! The floors got stained today!!! The photos of the floor after it was sanded are really interesting because the floorboards (original to the house circa 1890) warped in the flood from Hurricane Ike and so the sanding looks all striped. The outer edges of the boards cupped up. What shows in the pictures is the stain down the middle of each board. I hope it will be done before we head that way. It will be so wonderful to be back in a restored house!

Greetings from Florida!

I am in Florida at my Mum's condo and we are packing... Actually, she is packing and I'm "encouraging." There really isn't much I can do since she has all those tiny decisions to make about whether each object is going with her to Galveston, into storage or to Goodwill. I guess I'm really here for moral support and/or nagging. She has made a lot of headway and there are boxes EVERYWHERE. She also is pretty realistic about it. Whatever doesn't get packed by her, the movers will do. I have taken over the floor plan. We have a mostly to scale plan of the dollhouse and are trying to figure out what furniture will fit. The answer: not much - the place is TINY.

I've been lounging and decompressing since I've been here. Since school ended, I've been to the CEDFA(Council for Educators in Fine Arts - I think)conference, been to two different trainings, moved out of my house and into the dollhouse, celebrated Chris' graduation, gone to see a lymph specialist, gotten measured for garments... It is nice to just stop and breathe. I actually read a book! Mum has a couple of Carl Hiaasen novels that I haven't read so I just finished Tourist Season last night, or should I say this morning? As a teacher I guilt myself out of reading for pleasure. My thought process goes something like this: If I'm driving I can listen to books chosen for pleasure, but if I can actually put on the eyeglasses and read, I feel I should be grading papers or reading one of the "young adult" novels that I have class sets of. The list of books is HUGE. There are nearly 70 novels that I haven't read and should- and these are books we own! This looming list makes me much more empathetic with my students - if I'm not interested in reading it, why should they be? I try to give them choices, but the challenge is I have to read lots of books first to give them options.

Well, I wore my new glove and my "loaner" sleeve on the plane and followed directions to keep it on for a few hours afterwards. I didn't get any swelling, just a weird tingling/burning sensation in my arm, so I guess it worked. I have asked my Mum to keep me away from the hot tub, because although I love it, I understand that the heat can cause me to swell. There are lots of things I shouldn't do, like getting sunburned, mosquito bitten, scratched or cut. So far I only have swelling (edema) in my chest below the scar and on the back of my hand. I would like to keep it that way. I MUST be really careful because once any body part starts having swelling, the body part will swell (and have pain)for the rest of my life. Lymphedema is not reversible. There are worse things than not being able to enjoy a hot tub. I should be grateful that I am still here to make the choice! I am. Grateful, I mean.

My mammogram came back clean. I had it done on the 2 year anniversary of my cancer diagnosis. Yay me! The technician gave me congratulatory hug! She also offered to track down Dr. Leonard, who was on vacation, and have him read my mammogram. Now Dr. Leonard has been very good to me(he has done my biopsies and all the other major stuff, as well as my recent ultrasound) and is the big expert, but I didn't think it necessary. Nice of her to offer - she wanted me to feel secure!

While I was in Austin for CEDFA, I was able to go see my brother Steve's new house. It is very nice, it has 3 bedrooms, two stories and a nice yard. It is a big space, but Steve is a big guy and has lots of books. It won't be long before he has it filled. He is really enjoying his first house, planning how to decorate and so on. We also went out to dinner - Cuban of course!

Well, gonna go and shower so we can go to the grocery store. Gotta get back on the eating plan. Later.

It is OFFICIALLY summer

Friday was the last day of my 2009-2010 contract and I locked my classroom up for summer. I had an appointment with the lymphedema therapist, Vickie, so I wasn't able to go to the staff get-together. I wish I had. I really LIKE the people I work with and would have enjoyed the opportunity to hang with them.

About the Lymphedema- yep, I have it. I already had lymphedema in my chest, but now I have some in my right hand and arm. It is NOT reversible, but may be controlled with therapy (massage- not the feel-good kind) and use of a compression garment. I will need a custom made lymphedema sleeve that I hope to get measured for this week and a glove which can be off-the-shelf. I just have to work all this into my busy summer schedule which is as follows:

Saturday (yesterday) 7:45 a.m. took Chris, Pat and Carolyn (his parents) to Moody Gardens convention center for Chris' medical school graduation. Then attended and hob nobbed at the Dean's reception at 12:30. Back to our house for a party/open house. We had more people in our house that we ever had before. It was odd because most of our belongings are not here now and we had lots of folding chairs. It felt like a different place. Guests included Lori, Paul, Ashley and Emily (Chris' sister and family; Pat and Carolyn (his parents); Will Godwin (a high school bud of Chris')and his family (Olga, Max and Clem); Michael and Donna (Chris' brother and wife); Patrick and Lauren (another brother and wife); Cynthia and Lee Onxley (across the street neighbors); and Sherri (neighbor.) We had Subway sandwiches, WAY too much sweet stuff, fruit and veggies. It would have been a wonderful day except that Chris has been "suffering some intestinal distress." Yes, that is a euphemism for "cannot be far from the toilet." Poor guy, he really wasn't able to enjoy himself. He was not the only one graduating who had some additional requirements to complete, either.

Tomorrow we move out of our house and into the dollhouse we rented for Mum while they paint and refinish our floors. About time! We also have to take Haas to stay with Michael and Donna (in N Houston) while this is getting done. I have to get measured for the new garment, get the car washed/detailed and pack. I have a training on Tuesday and also a lympedema appointment. Wednesday I have a mammogram and leave to go to a conference in Austin. I'll be there through Friday. I have more training next Monday and leave on the 15th to go help Mum move...

Over Memorial Day weekend I went to Ft. Worth to see my friends Judd and Louise. We had a marvelous time. Lou was celebrating her 60th birthday and it was wonderful to see them and celebrate. We figured out that we have known each other since the mid 1980's! I also got to visit with their kids, Nick and Jessie, who I haven't seen since they were small. Jessie is 29! Time. Also staying with Judd and Lou were some of their friends from Louisiana, Jimmy and Lorna, and I feel like I made a couple of new friends... I had a GREAT time.

This seems also to be a time for loss. Tom Enger, a guy I've known since I was 18, died leaving behind a lot of people who loved him. I can so easily picture him with his son Paul (a toddler at the time) hanging out in the green room at UTEP...

Oh yeah. Wednesday is the 2 year anniversary of my Breast Cancer diagnosis. I am celebrating by getting a mammogram!

Busy time of year...

Only 9 days of school left this year!!! Wow. Testing went well for the most part. I administered the re-take orally and that gave me WAAAY too much knowledge of what my kids were really doing. As I walked around, I DID NOT say anything, because it is against the law, but WOW they have no clue... Most of this group will be in summer school, sadly. We are moving into the hectic final days with field trips, talent show, graduations, field day, exams, end of year awards, report cards and banquets. Whew.

I passed my English Language Arts high school certification! I was kind of worried, mainly because there is a lot of literature I haven't read (or can't remember) that was referenced on the test and I wasn't motivated enough to study- at all. Since I teach Language Arts all day every day, I was betting that I would do OK, although the farther I got from the test date the more I doubted myself. I scored 283 out of 300. Yay me. Now all I have to do is pay the money to become officially certified... This summer I will attend a training and become AP(advanced placement) certified (endorsed?) I don't believe there is a test...

My friend Louise is celebrating her 60th birthday this coming weekend and I'm going to the par-tay! I haven't seen Louise and Judd (her husband) in years and I am truly excited about the weekend. I'm going to drive up to Ft. Worth on Saturday for the Sunday party!!! It will probably be odd, since I know none of her local friends, but I can't wait to see them!

Eating plan is going pretty well. I am newly motivated since I have now lost 23 pounds. Chris has done much better than I. I guess the massive cheating is obvious in my numbers... I just crave dairy and bread, neither of which is on this plan. He is down by about 30 pounds!!! He says he feels better for it.

The house is getting very bare now. Yolanda and Kevin have done a good job moving all the stuff so we can have the floors refinished. The less we have in the house the more I am motivated to simplify and pare down our belongings. We have come a long way from when Chris and I lived in 700+ square feet in NY! We have acquired way too much STUFF.

Health update: Hand swelling is not so pronounced as before, but still present. Right arm has been having some weird sensations. Am I getting back feeling in my arm and that's why? Whatever is happening, it is not pleasant and makes my arm feel raw, like someone has scraped my skin. Ankle and knee are still a little problematic and give me an ache every now and then, but not constantly, so that's an improvement.

Big changes

13 days of school left. My kids do the TAKS re-test this week and I'm a little tense and stressed.

Hand is still a little swollen. I guess I'll have to have it looked into. Maybe get one of those gloves... Knee and ankle are much better, I hardly know there was a problem. Stairs remind me though.

Saturday was the memorial get-together for Sandra Raftis. It was wonderful and sad and beautiful. So many people loved her and shared memories. It was held at the Strand Theatre where Sandra had done so much work over the years and her spirit was very present.

Tomorrow Yolanda and Kevin (our handi-couple) will start packing up the house. They are also in charge of all the repairs and painting, so we are finally getting to the part where our house may soon be back to "normal." They'll start the painting and refinishing of the floors by the 8th of June, so we need everything out. Things are ramping up for a busy few weeks!

Swelling!

I'm not too happy today, since I have been having a pain in my right hand for a few weeks now and it has started swelling. I talked to the nurse at Dr. Markowitz' office and they want to see me if it continues, to treat me for lymphedema(accumulation of lymphatic fluids due to the compromise of my lymph system!) Arrgh. I have been elevating it and putting heat on it, but it is still swelling. Specifically it is on the back of my hand, between the first two knuckles. It feels like I just had an IV taken out - that's the kind of pain. I hope, hope, hope it isn't lymphedema because that is NOT reversible. I just don't know what could be causing the pain and swelling. I haven't been as careful as I should be with my arm and hand, but now...

Gonna go vote now. I REALLY hope that the proposed $53 million dollar stadium for GISD is voted down. They couldn't maintain the old one... They are cutting jobs, losing students and they want a new stadium and the bond debt WHY? Oh, well, gonna do my civic duty.

A week of passings

This past week two passings: Sandra Raftis, a beautiful, talented actor/director and elegant gracious woman left us. She had lung cancer and leaves the Galveston theatre community with a big hole. I had the honor of working with her and she was a giving actor and excellent director. Her spirit was so alive, so creative, intelligent, calming, kind... I wish I had the words to describe her. I suppose it is a testimony to her that she was so hard to describe. I wish I had known she was ill...
Sunil Rajan, a good friend of Chris' died today. He had been dealing with tumors in his head for quite a long time, and they finally got him. He was a really talented sound designer and all around good guy. Chris and he became quite close when they toured with "Carousel." I am so glad that Chris was able to see him one last time when he was in NYC...

My doctor's appointment on Friday went well, and Dr. Markowitz was glad to see that I've lost 15 pounds. He asked me if it was on "purpose?" DUH, like I just lost weight accidentally???!! My hair is thinning due to the Arimidex, but it is not all that noticeable to anyone but me, so we won't do anything about it just yet. The Arimidex is supposed to keep me cancer free and it seems to be doing that, so I'll deal with the thin hair. Since my hair is curlier than before the chemo, it really doesn't show, but I am so used to having a LOT of hair that it is weird. Other than some tenderness over my mastectomy site, I am good to go for another 3 months. Yay, me!

Chris comes home tonight after going to LA to take his Clinical Science exam. He feels pretty good about it and is really grateful for the prayers on his behalf. He was also able to spend some time getting to know the nieces, Sage and Jade. They are now very different from the babies he knew before. He hadn't been able to go with me the last couple of times I went to LA, and was missing out on seeing these two beautiful girls grow up. They are amazing. My sister, Becka and her husband James, are doing an excellent job raising them.

Only 23 days of school left this year! Wow.

It's Saturday, again

Got some results back from the first batch of state testing(my students.) It was a little worse than I expected. One of my 8th graders who was totally capable of passing didn't!! I'm VERY annoyed at him. It seems that he has decided that making an effort on this test is bowing to some sort of government conspiracy - go figure. I also only had 2 of my 5th graders pass. I was actually expecting that. Two of them, however were within 9 points of passing!!! That is probably- in the scaled score- equivalent to one question. I now have about 3 weeks to work on them until the re-test. My 6th and 7th graders do the Reading test this coming week.

I still don't have the results of the certification test I took. There is an "essay" component, so it may take longer than most other tests. I just want to know if I have to re-test, so I can make summer plans.

Health-wise, I have been NOT wearing the ankle brace for the last few days. Not too much pain or swelling, but it still lets me know it's there and not too happy with me! I have a check up with the Oncologist this coming Friday, and I hope he will be pleased with the (not enough) weight I've lost. On that front I haven't been so good recently. The last few days that Chris was out of town I was BAD. I'm back on the wagon again...

Got the keys for the little cottage my mom is renting. This weekend I need to get in there and do some measurements for her. I don't know if I mentioned this already, but it has been referred to by the previous residents as "the dollhouse."

Chris is home and studying. He has one of his big tests later this week in LA. He will get the opportunity to visit with the nieces! Becka, my sister, has kindly invited him to stay, so he'll get to know the girls again. It has been YEARS, 7+ years to be more accurate, since he's seen them!

Haas is really enjoying the new drywall. He thinks it is delicious and has taken to tearing off the paper and eating large strips of it. So far, what he has destroyed will be hidden by baseboards, but we're not sure how to stop him. I'm sure that what is going on his tiny little bunny brain is along the lines of: "They put in more paper and wood for me to chew! I've been feasting on this for over a year with no problem... why now?"

I've not forgotten...

Been really busy. We are in the midst of TAKS(Texas state testing) season at school and I've been working my kids till they can hardly see straight. WE have another round of tests the last week of the month.

Chris is in New Jersey taking a clinical skills training course and I have a test for 8-12 English Language Arts certification tomorrow.

The workers have finished putting drywall in the house! now we have walls that go to the floor!!! We have new screen doors! They will finish the floors and wall texture along with the painting when we move out for a while in June. We have fun and games in store...

Mum is moving to Galveston! We rented the little across the street for her and it's adorable. It's like a dollhouse AND it's right across the street. Now she'll be close by but with a little privacy.

Health-wise I'm doing OK. Still having trouble with the ankle and less with the knee. I am back to wearing the brace on the ankle...

Miracle.. I'm down about 10 pounds!

OK, so I didn't start the new eating plan on Monday as intended. I did however, begin on Wednesday and when I weighed myself this morning I was down about 10 lbs! I say "about" because last week I weighed myself at the Dr's office and today I weighed myself on the scale at home. Either way, I'll take it! Chris is down 12 lbs. He thinks it is a combination of the diet and the lack of salt... This is a great motivator!!!! We may have found something that works for us.

More later, the worst side effect of this new eating plan is that I have had a headache since Wednesday... I'm sure I will adjust, eventually to the lack of refined foods and sugar and salt... Gonna go lie down. Don't know if I'll get any rest as the drywall people are here.

Progress is being made!

This weekend Kevin (our construction guy) is coming to put in Sheetrock! Yay. Walls that will go all the way to the floor. I guess I will have to get out of the house or work on the computer to stay out of his way...

I am in a puppy quandary. A friend at work has some adorable little half Shihtsu half Chihuahua puppies and I am thinking of taking a little male. Chris said it was OK if he gets along with Haas, but I am not so sure. I think I may take him home for a night or two (the weekend maybe) and see if he fits in. If not there is another person on staff that will take him. Maybe having a puppy for a few days will be enough and I'll be over it.

We started our new eating plan this week. Chris was home last night and this morning and got me started today. Interestingly enough, I got him ready for the plan and didn't get myself ready! The hardest part may be not being able to have cream with my coffee, not even fat free!

I went on a big Field Trip with my kids to see a concert last night and it was fun and interesting for a few reasons. The littler kids are certain that I know them because they know me. By this I mean that I've taken my class to read to them and we've done presentations and plays, which I always introduce, so they think I know them. Unfortunately I don't know their names and a few kids were upset by that fact. Also, on this trip I saw Mary Allums, the wife of our band director. I hadn't really spoken to her since last year when we worked together. I had, however said HI. Anyway, she didn't recognize me and came up to be sure it was me. I am not as conscious of the changes since I live in this body every day, but she said I was beautiful. Nice compliment. Seems she had said "Hi" all those times and not known I was me!

It looks like my mom might actually move here to Galveston in the near future! She is trying to get out from under her condo in Bradenton where she is "underwater." I have been trying to get her here since before the hurricane... Plans just kept changing. Chris and I both enjoy having her around, so I'm looking forward to it.

The End of Spring Break

Tonight Chris, Donna, Michael and I went to dinner at the Red Onion Cafe and had a wonderful time and a great meal. Every time we spend time together with them I enjoy myself more. They are terrific people.

Earlier today I took a practice test to find out how the certification test for 8-12 English Language Arts will go for me. I did really well! Depending on how it is averaged, I scored an 87% or an 89% on the test portion. The "essay" won't be graded for a while... I was pleased and shocked since I did NO studying. I do have a liberal arts degree and am teaching ELA every day, so I guess I'm not quite going in blind. This morning, Chris and I went shopping to Whole Foods and got some supplies for a new eating plan we begin on Monday.

Other things accomplished this week:
*Got a manicure and pedicure - green nails! Yes, on purpose.
*Soaked in a hot tub
*Lolled around in bed - in a hotel room! Many naps were had.
*Spent time with my husband
*Saw the doctor for a physical - Yes, blood work and everything
*Completed my supply orders for school. I have 3 separate budgets!!! I have 3 separate departments, theatre, reading and Language arts. It is not easy to figure out which one should pay for the drawing paper or the pipe cleaners
* began reading American Pastoralwhich has been on my list for a VERY long time.
*got a massage
*got new stairs - OK I didn't really do this...

The basics from my Drs appointment is that my ankle is still swelling regularly and it hurts. Sometime I can't sleep because it bothers me so much. Dr. Weaver gave me some muscle relaxers and I am to wear my brace for a while. We hope that does it.

I had a funny experience this week. I ran into a student of mine who I was rather close to last year and he didn't recognize me! It wasn't until much later when I realized that I was out of context and I had hair, dark curly hair. How would he have recognized me? The teacher he had was bald and sickly. I NO LONGER LOOK THE SAME!!

So here's the story...

Here's the story of the "collateral" vein...

I felt a swelling over my right collarbone and it was there for a few days. Right over the collarbone, so I know it couldn't be a muscle(or knot in a muscle.) I would go on but I'm boring myself... Short version: I'm fine.

We just had the front steps rebuilt and they have torn out the back steps. Progress is being made. We may actually have the house back to normal at some point this summer! I'm not too picky, but I'd like to have drywall, heck WALLS, that go all the way to the floor. Our heating bill has been outrageous and it will be hot soon. I'm not enjoying the bugs or the dust either.

Chris is home for the night, since he has a doctor's appointment tomorrow. I plan to go back to Houston with him and play tourist for a few days, enjoying the hotel and pool. Depending on how my leg feels I may do some museums. Hey, it's spring break!

It's collateral

So, I went and had the "swelling" over my collarbone checked out and after a bit of a runaround I am fine. The ultrasound showed it was just a "collateral" vein, which is my body re-routing the blood vessels to compensate for the surgery and blood clots. More details later, but I'm REALLY relieved.

Weird new thing...

I have a swelling over my right collar bone that Chris thinks is a swollen lymph node. I am not happy about it, but I have to look in to it. Can't ignore anything like this... I have an appointment with my primary care Dr. Monday at 2:40 and I need to ask for a referral. Probably need imaging and a biopsy. Fun.

My ankle is swollen up. I thought it was healing!!!

I am in Houston at Chris' hotel. I came yesterday after school and will go home tomorrow early. I wanted to see him, but I have piles and piles of papers to grade to get my progress reports in by Monday at 4:00. Last night we went out for Indian food and may go see a movie tonight. We want to see Avatar, but Chris can't see 3D. Anyone know if the non-3D version is worth seeing?

This has been a week of leaving... One of my kids, Brenda, a 7th grader who was just learning English, moved out of the school on VERY short notice Tuesday. It was one of those, "Today is my last day and I'm leaving before lunch!" Sad. Love that kid. Also, the secretary at my school, who has been there for YEARS, had her last day Yesterday. We did a big going away thing for her... She is almost a second mother to a lot of the kids at my tiny school and changed diapers for a few of the middle schoolers back in the day! We have a teacher at our school who was a student under her! Needless to say, it was a very emotional day for all. Kids crying everywhere. Next week we lose one of our 8th graders!! Another sad day is in store.

Crenshaw is such a tiny school that everyone is like family. When Travis leaves on Thursday, I will only have FIVE 8th graders!!! Okay, fellow teachers, don't get jealous. That is my smallest class AND I have 5 different preps. I am also solely responsible for the reading and writing test scores for 4 separate grade levels. If even one of my kids doesn't pass the state test, my average is shot! Not only my average, but our school rating. Now a little bragging: ALL OF MY 8TH GRADERS PASSED THE TAKS BENCHMARK!!! All but one of my 10 7th graders passed the writing benchmark (real thing is next week.) My 6th graders are doing pretty well, too. I only have 2 of the 11 that I'm worried about. The group I lose sleep over is my 5th grade, who need to pass the test in order to advance to 6th grade. I only have 2 passing at this point...

Nothing new.

Nothing much new to report.

Chris is in Houston doing a Kaplan University course, so I've been home alone... The neighbors have been checking up on me - nice people. He did come home for a night/day and is leaving tonight.

School is stressing me out. This past week was benchmark testing and I am kind of dreading the results. I wish I knew what they were NOW so I could plan for the week... I've already decided to cover the "rule of three" so we'll see what else is needed. Good thing I think well on my feet.

Knee and ankle appear to be getting better. I still have some pain, but it isn't constant, so that is an improvement.

There are supposed to be people working on our roof, but I haven't seen hide nor hair of them.

We finally watched the season premiere of LOST last night and WOW. I love that show. I'm so glad it's back on, but sad that it is going to end soon. Chris and I have derived so much pleasure from discussing this show.

Big Anniversary

Yesterday was the anniversary of my surgery. Yes, it's my mastectoversary and hysterectoversary! Hmm, what is the appropriate celebration for the momentous occasion? I just taught some kids some stuff and watched some American Idol (TIVO is wonderful.) We did make Mardi Gras masks in school yesterday... And, we celebrated Valentines day, so it was a bit festive.

Thursday was my court date for the renegade underarm seat belt debacle. I showed up, having to take the afternoon off from work and make my way through the endless rain, to find that just because I showed up and the officer didn't, the case was dismissed. The big, big annoyance is that my bond will be returned to me in 4-6 WEEKS! Now, I don't need this money right now, but what of the poor, disenfranchised people for whom $379 dollars is not something they can 'float?' If your case is dismissed, and you are declared innocent, you should get your money back right away. In cash. How wrong is that? Many people cannot scrape together that much money to loan the government and have to pay an extra amount to have a bond agent do it for them - how much does that suck? If you are guilty, you deserve the inconvenience and cost, but for people like me? End of rant.

Chris goes to Houston for 6 weeks starting on Sunday to do a study camp. I will miss him... Going to go and spend some quality time with my guy - right now.

I'm still, still here

I haven't been on here much lately. Busy. School/work is about all I can handle these days. I come home late and exhausted. I still enjoy my job, don't think otherwise. It's just hard. We are coming up on state testing and I have a bunch of kids that need lots of INTERVENTION. There are some that will not pass no matter what I do and it is frustrating beyond all belief. I also am in charge of WAY too much testing and record keeping associated with testing that has nothing to do with the actual teaching. In addition, I have been pulled from the classroom for a few trainings that my district has foolishly scheduled during the class day. I have another one coming up! I am on the textbook selection committee, so I have to review a lot of proposed English Language Arts textbooks and go to weekly meetings... Oh, yeah, I have been asked to study for and take the certification test for teaching English in High School since we will probably offer 9th grade next year. Yeah, my plate is oozing over the top in big gooey globs. I have at least put my foot down(somewhat) and will NOT be doing a UIL play.

We will definitely be in Galveston for at least another year. This is a good news, bad news thing. Chris didn't pass a couple of tests that he must pass in order to begin his residency, so he has an intensive study program planned that will allow him to "match" for residency next year. Anyone who knows him knows that he is capable, he just has to focus and do it. I am kind of happy because I love my school and like to know that the things I put in place this year are going to be foundation for next year. I am however, upset that Chris has to go through all this.

The leg (sprained ankle and knee) are still painful and although I apply heat every day when I get home from school, have been wearing the ankle and knee brace, and am using a cane, I don't see much improvement. I am having to take more pain medicine that I would like. Not lots, but I take a pain pill about once a day.

The breast, or lack, doesn't hurt much anymore. It does swell (lymph fluid) and hurt, but i guess my attention is on the leg so much that I'm not paying much attention.

This coming week is my court date for the seat belt ticket. I know I will be "not guilty" but I wish I didn't have to take the afternoon off work to attend to this. Another class I won't have with my kids!

I've been found!

Yesterday, one of my new students "found" me on the Internet and was SO excited to show everyone my picture from when I was young... She found the "headshot" from Batboy, that was from about 8 years ago. The picture is the one on the main page of this blog. One of the other kids (who should receive extra credit) said I look better now. This new student also found this blog and I think that as a 5th grader it was "too much reading." Oh well...

I had two doctor's appointments yesterday. First, I saw Dr. Markowitz, my Oncologist, who I hadn't seen since about this time last year. I have since gained almost 20 pounds! I have to lose it. Not only is the extra weight unsightly, uncomfortable and unhealthy, it may cause the cancer to re-occur. Medication, menopause, whatever, this cannot continue. Today begins the BIG CHANGE. No more junk, or fast food. No more cokes during the week - I'll allow one per day on the weekend - I know I have to be able to stick to it!!! I know myself and I know I LOVE my Coca Cola. I will make ahead breakfast and lunch to take with me to school... Now, I intend to make these meals as tasty and gourmet as possible so I won't feel deprived, but I will know what is in them and be sure of the nutrition and calories. Dr. Markowitz also said that I should start doing some weight training especially with my right arm! He said the latest studies on lymphodema have indicated that weight training and exercise are actually good for me and will, done correctly, reduce the likelihood of lymphodema. I am all for this, and will do some research on the subject. Otherwise, everything looks good and I'm healing well. I do have a few odd places where I'm tender - partly because I'm starting to get feeling back.

Second appointment was with Dr. Siller, an orthopedic surgeon. He said that my ankle and knee are healing well and I should continue to exercise them. Walking is the answer. If I have pain, pull back. Continue to wear the braces as long as I have pain and he envisions that I will be better in 6-9 weeks. This is good news. He didn't want to see me again. He said that unless something gets worse, I shouldn't need to come back.

Turns out that right after I left L.A. my sister, Becka, decided that my crutches were so fashionable she needed her own. She has sprained her ankle pretty badly and is maneuvering the stairs in her house on her butt... I KNOW that I am a role model, but this is ridiculous. I hope she heals quickly, since her life is very busy (she is a definite type A)and she is in the process of doing job interviews.

New year, old me

Had a great time in LA playing with my nieces and hanging with family. Jade (8 year old niece) kept asking "What do you want to do?" Often the answer was: "Exactly what I'm doing now, visiting with people I love!" Somehow this wasn't totally satisfying her... We did do other things: went to Getty Villa, made videos, decorated my luggage, made smencils (smelly pencils), danced, read, ate, drank, practiced knitting and telling time, visited with old friends and sang. The only way it could have been better is if Chris had been there.

I managed to hurt myself a bit too much over the holiday. I cut my finger pretty badly before I left. Not bad enough for stitches, but bad. I lost a filling. And THEN I fell down the stairs at Becka's and sprained my ankle and knee. Yeah, I know... I am now in the too familiar state of quasi-invalid. I hate it. The knee and ankle a getting better every day. I now can move my knee pretty normally (although it does hurt) and the ankle isn't really swollen anymore. Maybe subconciously I wasn't getting enough attention??