Port placement: part 1

So, bright and early yesterday(6:45) Mom and I go to the radiology department to get my port-o-catheter installed. For those not in the know, it is a thing that they install under your skin that allows them to inject stuff (like chemo) directly into your blood stream without having to "stick you" every time. Mom explained it as a "sort of tap". Anyway, we go to my new favorite place , the radiology department, and get guided to a little pre/post op area and they start hooking me up and let me pee. They give me a gown that is size GIGANTICUS and is falling off even my generous shoulders - I'm thrilled that a hospital gown is too big - that never happens! I meet the nurses and they ask all the pertinent questions and take all the vitals... I get wheeled into the OR and there I lie watching people prep for the surgery, unwrapping stuff, squeezing stuff, putting tape on me and stuff.
Of course I get an itch right below my nose when I have my arms bound down by my sides and everything is taped and the oxygen thing falls out of my nose from all the twitching I'm doing. The nurse tries to help, but you know how that is - someone else can never find the right spot! So, they give me the joy juice and I'm pretty happy and sleepy until I hear the hushed tones of concern. Damn. They inject my neck vein with some dye and I can see it on the monitor spreading out like a fan. Is it supposed to do that? I can guess from the murmurs -NO! They murmur a little more. Try it again and then cancel the party! Turns out I don't get a port today. Turns out I'm a mutant. They try to explain why to me but I'm kind of doped up. Mom is with me and Dr. Unpronounceable tries to explain to her and ... Later on Chris calls him and gets the low down: I have a "double superior vena cava" and my subclavian leads into the great cardiac vein instead of the top of the heart where it is supposed to. So, now all the experts are meeting/researching to decide if it is OK for chemo to be done this way with someone who has a heart like mine. There just aren't many mutants who have had chemo. Tentatively, I have a second-try appointment on Friday at 9:00 a.m. to install the port if they don't come up with a reason why not.